Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
She's like a pop up book from hell.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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