what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
