Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
