the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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