i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
