My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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