i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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