erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
She's just so happy...and so naked.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
how drunk are you?
Several
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
