they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
