So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
