if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
