If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize