Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize