your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
