he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
