I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
