This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i just made my gag reflex go away.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
