i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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