ugly people sure do ruin things
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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