I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
smell my finger.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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