did you get engaged???
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
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