In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Are we in a gay sports bar?
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
