The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
it glows. i had to have it.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize
