She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
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When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
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I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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