I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
