we have officially lost it.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Randomize
