She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Randomize
