yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize