I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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