please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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