this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
