My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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