Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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