its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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