Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
