you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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