...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
