A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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