I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
