My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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