Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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