I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
