I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize