i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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