I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize