Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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