I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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