Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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