She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
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Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
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Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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