sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
