i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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