: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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