Those balls look pretty dangerous.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
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