I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize